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Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (Two-Disc Special Edition)
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FUNNIEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR!!! Too bad it isn't a comedy. : Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (Two-Disc Special Edition)
THIS is the movie Lucas, Spielberg and Ford were all excited to make??? We've come to expect this sort of childish nonsense from George Lucas, but Steven Spielberg and Harrison Ford also thought this was a good idea??? This is an absolutely awful excuse for a movie much less an entry into the Indiana Jones canon.
Fortunately for me I had the time of my life laughing at it's stupidity. I was in tears for most of the whole film because I just couldn't believe how bad it all was and just when I thought what I had just seen was bad enough, something even more ridiculous happened.
Examples:
Only a handful of guards at the US base protecting our most important secrets and artifacts, including the ARK!!!
It seems we've all over-reacted to the threat of atomic bombs as you can just get inside a refrigerator at ground zero and survive it. Oh yeah, then you'll be able to get out of it instead of getting locked inside and dying like others have before.
We also now know that boxers and MMA fighters are just a bunch of fragile weaklings because Indiana Jones took about a 1000 punches to the face and barely had a mark to show for it.
Tarzan swinging??? Are they serious??? He catches up to 2 speeding vehicles doing it!!!
The car scene, where it jumped off the cliff onto a branch and then they drove into the water??? Uh, yeah right.
How about Dr. Jones and company going over not 1, not 2, but 3 WATER FALLS in a freakin military jeep and surviving without or scratch on them!!!
Giant Ants??? Where do you find those?
Mayans just waiting inside the walls to pop out and attack intruders. How did they get in there anyways???
The skull was far too light to be crystal and looked like plastic filled with aluminum foil. Sure was easy to find too.
Every time they get wet, five minutes later their clothes are dry, pressed and cleaned. How about some consistency here?
And then the capper, it's all about........(drum roll)..........ALIENS!!! Yes, our standard, prototypical aliens with elongated heads and a flying saucer. E.T. go home indeed.
And there you have it. Indiana Jones has gained superpowers over the years and an experienced, award winning director has managed to make a movie with all the ability of a 5th grader. Whatever drove Lucas to madness has spread to Spielberg. Somebody put a stop to it before other talented film makers turn out nonsense like this! Oh well, at least I didn't pay for it and I laughed harder and longer during this mess than anything in recent memory. Although, people usually want you to laugh with them, not at them. I hope that's enough for them. I'd still like my 2 hrs. back though.
If you want to see 2 hrs. of what not to do in a movie and enjoy laughing at other peoples mistakes, go right ahead and check this out. But if you value your time, like the other Indiana Jones movies, quality films and consider yourself an intelligent person and like movie makers to treat you like you are, RUN, don't walk away from this movie. Avoid, Avoid, Avoid, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the NUMB Skull.
